Loneliness is weird, Ever since i was a child ive been alone, No siblings, one friend. As I've grown, I've lost many friends, Including that one from childhood, She replaced me, My other friendships feel conditional, If they need me, im there, Otherwise, our "friendships" are obsolite. I have one used to fufill, Be of use to those around me. So many may say im alone. But i dont linger in loneliness, No, It colapses on you like a ton of bricks. Weighs so heavy that escape feels improbable, Always when connection is needed, Difficult times, challenges, When the normal person is in need of support, the lonliness crashed over in waves. The torturoues knowledge that im in need of someone yet have no one, It's an angony that twangs in your chest, Those twangs spell out what a lonely individual i am, and it breaks me, Then, as the challenges, difficulties subside, The waves of sadness subside, too. It makes me wonder Am i lonely? Is the loneliness real? Or am i like my conditional friends? Is that what companionship is? Did the books get it wrong? Or am i wrong, broken.