Wrapped around both my lung There's an empty space for someone's arms To pull me into the most loving hug Gentle and Safe, the kind that makes you warm I wish you would notice the necklace I wear Glinting like a heartbeat in the sun I never take it off, I swear It's from my great grandma, miss her a ton There is a barrier, I'm locked in a room Laughter surrounds me but never reaches I desire it but can never consume It's rings in my ears like siren screeches Somehow silence feels heavier When you wish it would just say your name People say it gets easier But I don't think the weight is the same I press my silver cross where your eyes should have been Did you even notice I noticed you wear that shirt every Thursday If I stopped caring this much it would feel like a sin You ignore every detail while I watch that shirt fray That girl with blonde hair, her perfume lingers like betrayal The smell aches in my chest It leaves this permanent trail It lands on her blouse but where is the rest Your breath fogs up a window no one looks into You draw a messy heart to replace the one missing Only this one doesn't beat, to be fair only few do As the fog fades it's like the cold and dew are kissing The streetlights pool on each sidewalk Yet every bit of gold misses me by inches The buzzing draws you in like a stop sign says stop Every heavy step wakes you up like someones pinches The puddles catch me in half light Like proof I exist, but barely When did your own existence become the most haunting sight I miss when I felt I was flying like a fairy Now I just fall as slow as a feather Yet the weight could crush ships in the sea Crashing down like waves in harsh weather I can't even explain what I perceive