As a little girl I always wanted to be a teenager. Now as a teenager I wish I was that bright little baby.. The little baby who wouldn't cut herself. Who wouldn't let people walk over her. Who wouldn't let herself be picked on by annoying boys. Who didn't care about boys. Who didn't care what people thought of her style. I wish I could go back and not worry about boys or drama or fitting in. I wish I could laugh without covering my mouth. I wish I was as happy as I was.. I wish I was fine. But look at me. Just a disappointment big sister now. Dont clean my room, dont go out, dont do my homework, dont make new friends, cant love anyone, doesn't talk about my feelings to anyone, keeps quiet, tries to fit in, hangs out with the wrong people and so much more. And people still tell me. That I have no idea how depression works. But it's whatever. Because if they don't know this side of me. I'm okay.