I sometimes wonder what happened to me. Like I never found a place, or a longing to be. Iv become as one in the emptiness that surrounds me. So much nothing as far as the eyes can see. A wasteland of wonder, hope and dispare. Moments of wishing someone could care. Each fake smile tells a million lies to the receiver. Sometimes my acting is so on point that even im becoming a believer. Choking on words I find to hard to say. Always questioning why I choose to stay. In this life I have learned that even pleasure can be a prison, vulnerable when my emotions have arisen. Addicted to the pain, chasing the sin still punishing the innocence of the child that still lies within. Every curse sewn into her skin. Angel eyes or tormented by the devil, within these thoughts she will revel.. touched by God, more like touched by a monster...