a_p_wyndham's commented: Ah! I love e.e. cummings! If it isn't too much trouble, since I don't usually write this way, I'd love to know what the emotional heart is to you. As in, what's working best—the bodily metaphor, the plain language, my weird compound noun line. And, additionally, if there's anything that might not be landing with as much force as it could.

Ah! I love e.e. cummings! 

If it isn't too much trouble, since I don't usually write this way, I'd love to know what the emotional heart is to you. As in, what's working best—the bodily metaphor, the plain language, my weird compound noun line. And, additionally, if there's anything that might not be landing with as much force as it could. 

0/500

lifeinslomo

I think that all of them worked together and blended well making the poem successful. I tend to get attracted to strong imageries so I might have first noticed the bodily metaphor in this case. I thought the images you painted were sharp and visceral. Imho, i am drawn towards plain language even though I have no aversion towards ornamental ones either, just that I won't use it lol